the world

has gone crazy, or maybe it has always been like this? and getting older just makes you realise how much more fucked up it actually is? the sadness, the poverty, the injustice, the pain, the corruption, the illnesses, the list goes on

but in saying that, the world is so wonderful, and the tiniest things can put a smile on anyones face//the sun, the flowers, the kisses, the love, the family, the true friends, the joys, the thrills, the list goes on

so is the world shit? or is the world splendid? am i wasting my time staying on it?

i already accepted that i relate to nothing. but then sometimes i disagree with that thought. the more i gain the lonelier i could become. staying relative is hard.
 staying honest is hard.
 i feel like sometimes i am like a ghost.
 i have nothing 
but myself.
 and potential to me, is the question of will.
 sometimes i feel like i should, or even say, need to take my loneliness in another world. and i want to so bad at times, and the other times i think i am stupid for thinking any of these thoughts? i need to learn how to stop destroying myself, stop being hard on myself and be nice to myself. life needs balance in order to flourish. sometimes the price of attaining an objective is finding out that what has been lost is too fragile to be re-created.

no more running away from something or someone or myself

but is it just a state of mind?


i, sometimes, something, i, sometimes, maybe, maybe, loneliness, wonderful sometimes, myself, sometimes, i, maybe, something

fuck